So as many of you know, I am currently entered in the WE Mastermind 5K Contest hoping to take MANDYLAND to the next level. It is Day 10 of voting with 5 more days to go, and quite frankly, it drives me nuts. After checking the numbers last night, I decided that I am no longer going to do so for the duration of the contest. Of course I will see how many votes I have when I cast my own vote each day, but I won't be checking beyond that and I am done checking my competitor's votes as well. Peace of mind matters more than keeping score so I will just remain focused on the things I actually do have control over. Things like my own happiness, asking for people to vote daily, and continuing my soul's work while the contest does its thing.
Whether someone votes or not, or whether I win or not, is completely out of my hands. My only job in any aspect of life is to show up as fully as possible each day with the goal of staying centered in my truth. The universe does the rest. I have watched as others get aggressive with certain goals over the years but it is not something I wish to emulate at all. Been there, done that, and all it ever created was stress along the way. I'd much rather be in the flow of life and lack of resistance is the only way to achieve that.
When I entered this contest my goal was not to win but to enter this contest. I believed my work was worthy of greater exposure and additional support. And each day my goal is to remind people to vote (if they are so inclined) with as much excitement as I can muster for the cause. I keep them updated on where I'm at in the contest and then it's up to them. I let the rest go.
If my goal is to win, then I will be upset or disappointed if I don't, and this is why I like to stay centered in who I am despite the externals. I try my best not to get too caught up in, or overly attached to, the things that come and go. I prefer to delight in the formless and operate from there. It's much more fun and light and lovely. And it's a much more powerful stance than to allow external conditions to define or validate you. I'd rather define and validate myself.
My well being was not dependent on winning the Literary Award I was nominated for in June. A nomination is great, but an award is always based on certain criteria which can hardly reflect everything adequately. It's a snapshot of a person's body of work in most cases, which is pretty limited. It also means there are winners and losers, which I never enjoy, but that's just how the masses have set things up. And so what. There are other options. Like the Mandyland Awesome Award where everyone wins no matter what. That's my kind of award. Who are we to deem someone worthy or not based on some arbitrary collection of information?
But alas, everyone loves winning. It makes them feel good. And worthy. And special. And validated. And appreciated. Yet when you already feel these things, you hardly need an award to do the job. The award is just a bonus. A nice recognition but nowhere near a reflection of all that you are capable of.
So this awareness is part of my internal dilemma each day as I ask people to vote for me in this contest. Yes I would love the opportunity to take my work to the next level, hence my reason for entering and my reason for posting about it a few times a day, but I certainly don't want to sell my soul in the process (and I do fear I'll be going to hell for inflicting this daily torture on the masses). Winning this contest (or anything for that matter) is not the be-all and end-all to my life or my career. I am going exactly where I am meant to go with or without the 5K business package. This is simply one experience along my path to greater abundance.
My winning this contest or not is based only on the number of votes and it really can't get anymore basic or superficial than that. The set up lacks depth and substance which is my biggest discomfort, and the only way I have found to alleviate that is to have fun along the way, engage my supporters in a light manner, and be grateful for the incredible level of support people have shown me through this process.
For someone with an aversion to politics on the whole, I sure have picked an interesting thing to get involved in because this contest mirrors a small scale election of sorts. You rally and get people tuned into your mission with the hopes that they will vote for you so that you can take that mission and apply it in a much bigger way. Seems fair enough, right? The guy with the most votes wins. I get it. I just don't agree with it.
Without going into too much detail about my personal views on politics (this quote by George E. MacDonald will give you a clue as to how I feel about it: "It is not in the nature of politics that the best men should be elected. The best men do not want to govern their fellowmen."), I will just say this: numbers do not count for much. At least not in Mandyland.
The things that are of real value cannot be measured except by the level of peace one feels in life, the depth and quality of connection one feels both with oneself and others, and the ability to touch and improve the lives of others. As if there is a scale to measure these things. There isn't, but these are my indicators for how well I'm doing in life, which includes my conduct in this contest.
Now that I am in the top two with another female, this contest has simply become about the numbers each day and our ability to keep them up and above the other. In the end (which is Monday, and it can't come soon enough!) our success depends more on our ability to convince people to vote for us than it does about the quality of the submission and mission, which kinda blows. Our fate is tied to something completely arbitrary, and not at all reflective of what we are capable of doing beyond recruiting people to our mission.
If I had less of a presence on Facebook I would have had no shot in hell in this contest I'm sure, yet my submission would have been the same. It just would have fallen behind the ones with greater marketing abilities. Welcome to the modern world where those with the most buzz win.
I'd like to think that MANDYLAND has risen to the top because of the relationship between me and my fans, followers, friends and family, that has been developing over a period of years and that I am being supported (hopefully) because these people value my work, trust my vision and want to see me do well and more.
Blind loyalty isn't what I'm after because that's no different than blindly following politicians and religion, both of which I abhor. Anyone who knows me and what I'm about will know how much I value and encourage the ability to think critically. So if you're voting for me without really knowing why, then thanks for the support but you're missing the point. Team MANDYLAND is about truth, independent thought, accountability, fun, authenticity, inner power, beautiful breasts and the courage to be yourself. If you value these things as well, that's awesome. Cast your vote!
If not, it's ok. You're entitled. If you're not into me or what I offer, that's fine too. Go to where you're drawn and do what you need to do. We are all free to follow our hearts wherever they may lead. Your joy awaits. And mine is already here:)